cloak of invisibility

sometimes i feel invisible. sometimes i feel so absent it makes me shake. like i'm not really there or here or wherever. like maybe i shouldn't be here and there is no point to any of this, this mysterious thing called life. it's a feeling of being completely alone and absent from everything and everyone. the kind of feeling you get when you are on a bad trip or something. but then i decide to look around myself. figure out what is important, what really matters to me, if anything does, that is. i still haven't come to a conclusion, i don't think anyone really can know the answer. one can only keep guessing. but i think once you look out your window and see all the different colours, smells, sounds and textures we have around us, you won't feel the need to keep on searching. or at least your search will come to a halt for a while because nature is overwhelming, life is exhilarating. everything around us has beauty in it, whether it is blatantly obvious or you need to search a little to find it. the people around us are beautiful too. everyone has their good side and bad side and i think that's a great thing, it keeps everything balanced. sometimes its hard to see the good in certain things or people and we decide to put a label on them but if we don't explore we will never be able to truly understand what and who they are.


You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life. - Albert Camus